All posts by Exgaycalling

Delaware’s July 2018 ban on ‘conversion’ therapy is based on phoney rhetoric and spin

On the 23rd of July 2018, Delaware governor John Carney (D) signed a law prohibiting medical and mental health professionals in the state from practicing or referring ‘conversion’ therapy for minors. The initiative did not come from any clients in Delaware but from gay-lib extremists from outside. Earlier this year, state Rep. Richard Collins (Republican Party – Millsboro) introduced an amendment to the bill that would have allowed conversion therapy if a patient requests it. In doing so, the self-determination of clients would have been protected by law. But the amendment did not pass due to the Democratic Party.

On their website, the gay-lib extremist organization Human Rights Campaign (HRC) who helped organize the campaign, labeled the ending of client self-determination as a Victory! Immediately after the vote, the HRC issued a press statement, filled with phoney rhetoric. Let us take a look. Continue reading Delaware’s July 2018 ban on ‘conversion’ therapy is based on phoney rhetoric and spin

Exploring Your Full Sexual Potential, part 24: Love me tender, love me sweet

In this article we will analyze how, for many men, same-sex attractions work. Imagine a young man on an old photo to whose image you feel attracted. You see him and immediately he strikes a chord in you. He looks gentle, and yet he is male. He’s great. How does he do it? You can’t keep your eyes off him, and you find yourself dreaming of his looks, his tenderness while a secret longing sets in. Wouldn’t it be great to be intimate with him, and to close your eyes in a hug? Continue reading Exploring Your Full Sexual Potential, part 24: Love me tender, love me sweet

Exploring your full sexual potential, part 23: When Nasty Becomes Psychopath

In our previous articles (21 and 22), we started exploring the consequences of the narcissistic-triadic family constellation. Frustrations can make you needy (part 21). In part 22, we showed how in more severe cases ‘needy’ can become ‘nasty’. Now we will take it one step further and reveal how ‘nasty’ can even become ‘psychopathic’, the saddest coping strategy of them all. In the first part of this article, we will look at the diagnosis from different angles.  In part 2, we will look into the therapy by analyzing an email from James about his past life events. Continue reading Exploring your full sexual potential, part 23: When Nasty Becomes Psychopath

Exploring your full sexual potential, part 22: When needy becomes nasty

It is difficult and shameful to acknowledge that you are needy. You do everything you can to gently help other people out. But you remain unseen. Even worse is handling the frustration that this leads to. There is anger and resistance. You are more angry than people realize, you can become nasty and because of this the shame keeps on growing. Continue reading Exploring your full sexual potential, part 22: When needy becomes nasty

Exploring your full sexual potential, part 21: Being Needy

Neediness, your life consists of neediness. Needy as a kid, needy as an adult. But look at that guy out there, he doesn’t have that. Wow, look at that self-confidence. He is not needy, he is just great. He walks, hangs around, or just gazes. He does so with beautiful eyes, with nice hair, and a great body although he is not even a bodybuilder. How does he do it? I, on the other hand (so you feel,) am needy. Why isn’t he the same? Continue reading Exploring your full sexual potential, part 21: Being Needy

Exploring your full sexual potential, part 19: The Snap Game

In part 18, we studied detachment from a theoretical perspective. In this article, we will demonstrate how it works in daily life. Men who predominantly experience Opposite Sex Attractions (OSA’s) attach to other men in a carefree way. But men who experience many Same Sex Attractions (SSA’s) also find themselves incessantly detaching from others. Two opposing forces appear to be at work: Attaching and Detaching. By means of a simple mind game, the Snap Game, you may start recognizing them. We will show three different insights that the game can lead to. Continue reading Exploring your full sexual potential, part 19: The Snap Game

Exploring your full sexual potential, part 18: Overcoming defensive detachment

In her 1983 book ‘The Early Development of Gender Identity’, the British research psychologist Elisabeth Moberley laid the foundation for a deeper understanding of same-sex attractions. Her contribution of the concept of defensive detachment is the groundwork for effective psychotherapeutic help that followed from a causal model. In this article, we will look into the mechanisms of detachment, and identify the challenge to recognize it when you are doing it. Continue reading Exploring your full sexual potential, part 18: Overcoming defensive detachment

Exploring your full sexual potential, part 17: Creating freedom in conversations

In the previous part, we ended by saying: The more you focus on the feelings of the other person, the less you will be preoccupied with self-doubt and self-consciousness”. But what if the other person is very self-indulgent and you find yourself becoming part of the wallpaper in the process, as you have done so often? How does one handle such a situation? Continue reading Exploring your full sexual potential, part 17: Creating freedom in conversations