In the radical gay-lib ideology, much emphasis is placed on being a victim. It has become the core of all activist thinking these days, justifying a war on others. But cultivating victim-hood has a down-side. It robs a person from assuming a more assertive and powerful stance. Weakness comes up and the chances of reaching goals wither away. Sometimes, being a victim has an authentic cause, but more often than not, the stance becomes addictive. People who are highly sensitive are particularly prone to feeling like a victim. In this article, we will investigate that problem. Continue reading Exploring your full sexual potential, part 28: “Victims feel too much” →

Matthew from Nebraska reached out by email the other day, asking “What is about the need for external male affirmation that still creeps up now and then?” He went on to explain that on some days he still feels inferior, or as he calls it ‘something other than maleness’. His most vital question at this time is: “Why do I still have the desire and yet at the same time hatred for certain men?” Continue reading Exploring your Full Sexual Potential, part 26, “The Dance of Defensive Detachment With Its Counterpart: Same-Sex Attractions” →

Many men who have same-sex attractions are searching for something that remains elusive. This is very frustrating. It can be quite helpful to understand the relation between being a person as a Subject or seeing oneself and other men as an Object. In this article, we will explain the relation between these two from a child-developmental viewpoint. It is called Subject/Object psychology. We will show how infant mental growth takes place and how this leads to a distinct awareness of the self and others. Continue reading Exploring Your Full Sexual Potential, Part 25: The Subject-Object Relation →

In this article we will analyze how, for many men, same-sex attractions work. Imagine a young man on an old photo to whose image you feel attracted. You see him and immediately he strikes a chord in you. He looks gentle, and yet he is male. He’s great. How does he do it? You can’t keep your eyes off him, and you find yourself dreaming of his looks, his tenderness while a secret longing sets in. Wouldn’t it be great to be intimate with him, and to close your eyes in a hug? Continue reading Exploring Your Full Sexual Potential, part 24: Love me tender, love me sweet →

It is difficult and shameful to acknowledge that you are needy. You do everything you can to gently help other people out. But you remain unseen. Even worse is handling the frustration that this leads to. There is anger and resistance. You are more angry than people realize, you can become nasty and because of this the shame keeps on growing. Continue reading Exploring your full sexual potential, part 22: When needy becomes nasty →