Tag Archives: ex-gay

Exploring your full sexual potential, part 9: Soul Murder

Thirty years ago, Dr. Leonard Shengold MD, introduced the concept of “soul murder” to the world of psycho-analytically based therapy. His insights in the book “Soul Murder” (1989) were well acclaimed, and also prove to be useful as a uniting concept that explains why men with same-sex attractions can on the one hand be close to women, but on the other hand fail to fall in love with them. Let us follow his narrative on the way in which the authentic male child cannot be found any more at an adult level, lost in the mists of time. Continue reading Exploring your full sexual potential, part 9: Soul Murder

Exploring your full sexual potential, part 8: The fear issue

In his answers to the self-help questionnaire, Gregor from Ukraine sent me an array of traumatic memories of his boyhood on the farm where he grew up. As a child, he felt isolated and grew up to become extremely uncomfortable with the outside world. His fear of his peers is an issue which is seen very often in men struggling with same-sex attractions. We will show his answers, and then review them in relationship to (1) role of the father, (2) the role of the mother, (3) the role of peers and (4) Gregor’s anger and fear issues. Continue reading Exploring your full sexual potential, part 8: The fear issue

Exploring your full sexual potential, part 4: Breaking free from Squaw Camp

breaking-free-squaw-camp1In the previous article, we showed that your problem is living in Squaw Camp during your childhood years. There you learnt to suppress and deny any hint of opposite-sex attractions. But how did you manage to survive? What happened to you, in what way did you learn to comply? And, above all, how do you break free from those shackles? Continue reading Exploring your full sexual potential, part 4: Breaking free from Squaw Camp

Exploring your full sexual potential, part 2: The sensitivity mismatch

square-oneMost men and women who experience Same-Sex Attractions (SSA’s) find themselves
belonging to the broad category of highly sensitive people, which comprises of roughly
a quarter of the population. In this part, we will focus on your sensitivity, and on how
difficult it is to identify with men who are far less sensitive. Continue reading Exploring your full sexual potential, part 2: The sensitivity mismatch

Exploring your full sexual potential, part 1: how sexuality works

Exploring your full sexual potential as a man, a 24 part stage coach ride. Many men feel same-sex attractions, and wonder about their opposite-sex capabilities. In this series, we will look deeply into those feelings, riding from stage coach stop to stage coach stop. Continue reading Exploring your full sexual potential, part 1: how sexuality works

1. Bias: organization bias in radical gay-lib rhetoric

Radical gay-lib has issued many statements in its endeavour to ban reparative therapy, but how biased are they? In a series of articles, we will look into various aspects of bias. We shall demonstrate the way it harms our perception of organizations, documents, surveys and professional recommendations. Extremist factions in gay-lib use bias deliberately, as we shall see. The first bias to look into is organization bias. When this bias is used, you are deliberately being manipulated. Continue reading 1. Bias: organization bias in radical gay-lib rhetoric

People are not born that way

In an well-documented essay, California psychologist Laura Haynes, PhD, demonstrates how the American Psychological Association finally agrees that the “born-that-way” ideology and the “you-cannot-change” ideology are NOT true. Here is the essay that she published on the 27th of September 2016. She debunks the myths that caused so many people in the past to avoid seeking psychotherapeutic help for their unwanted same-sex attractions, myths that have deterred them from exploring their full capacity of sexual fluidity. Continue reading People are not born that way

New scientific evidence Mayer and McHugh proves you were not ‘born that way’

couple13In August 2016 a groundbreaking study was published in the New Atlantis journal entitled “Sexuality and Gender: Findings from the biological, psychological and social sciences.” by two researchers Dr. Lawrence Mayer and Dr. Paul McHugh. This study draws from sixty years of research.

The major findings include:

1. “The idea that individuals are “born that way” – that sexual orientation is a biologically fixed, innate human trait is not supported by scientific evidence.”

2. “The idea that an individual could be “a man trapped in a woman’s body or a woman trapped in a man’s body” – in other words, the notion that a gender identity that is independent from or in conflict with biological sex, cannot be supported by scientific evidence.” Continue reading New scientific evidence Mayer and McHugh proves you were not ‘born that way’